Friday, June 15, 2007

Raggedy Update

A quote for my blog family

They... threw themselves into the interests of the rest, but each plowed his or her own furrow. Their thoughts, their little passions and hopes and desires, all ran along separate lines. Family life is like this - animated, but collateral.
~Rose Macaulay


I want to thank you for your comments over the past week. They meant a great deal to me. I appreciate each and every one of them. Thanks to all of you who sent email.

I am taking a moment to express my gratitude to the guest posters for lifting my spirits and making me laugh. Y’all are good medicine.
Thanks!


I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.~G.K. Chesterton

My son printed out my blog pages every day.
I tried to get him to go down the list on my side bar and print the pages from all my links but he gave me “the Look” and the “eye roll” and started talking real fast about all these things he had to be doing…


Thank you Hoss and Peter!

Thanks
Grizz FTS it was great to see your post too!

I did manage to sneak down in great pain to send a few emails.
If you don’t blog I guess it is hard to understand.
I got busted with that panda post and spewed my morning coffee with laughter.


I wubs you Hoss!

Hubby doesn’t read my blog but he did gander at the page our son brought up.
Probably because he wanted to see what was making me laugh so hard.
I got the folded arms and stern face.
"You got up to send a mail? What is wrong with you?"
"I miss my blog buddies?"
(*pout,*sniffles, reached for a tissue)
"They needed an update?"
(*raised my eyebrows)
"If we had a lap top?"
(*fluffed hair, winked, showed some leg)
It didn’t work…not even a smile...*sigh
He is on the computer but my blog doesn’t hold much interest for him.

I am going to be on recovery road for awhile longer.
I feel wonderful today because this is my second day without a headache.
Those were not your ordinary headaches they were headaches from...oh nm
The only thing I could do was lay down and then the spinal fluid would be in balance and the headache would be gone.
Not very convenient but the only thing to do.
My nerves and knees are another story but I am not going to complain about them...
nope... nope… nope...
It took quite some doing to make this post presentable.
Even the spell check can’t figure out my typos!
So I am not going to struggle with posting for a bit.
I am officially off of the bed rest orders!
*does a happy cat dance

I am amazed how tired I am though.
How can a person be tired after all that rest?

I have a lot of catching up to do here but I have to take it slow.

Find the carpet, find the sink, and I am sure the laundry baskets are hiding somewhere under those piles of clothes.

I lost some words three days ago that I still can’t find.
They used to come back but now they are not.
I will be mid sentence and I know the persons name, place, or object that I am wanting to say and whoosh it did not make it to my tongue and that word is history.
The same thing happens when writing I will be mid keystroke and I know the word I want to type but it is gone..gone..gone..
I wonder where lost words go.
Maybe the same place as lost socks.


My goal is to be back by the 23rd because the dern doctors are gonna be messing with me again on the 19th…

I found this nifty little flowchart I thought you might enjoy.



Huggles and Love y'all bunches… Miss you too!

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Thursday, June 14, 2007

Improving, Improving, Over the Bounding Main

I got a secret: Raggedy is s-l-o-w-l-y getting well better. I know this because she has commented on my b**g (I am Old Horsetail Snake at this here place). So she will be among us presently. Hoo boy and hooray.

+ + + + + + +

So (speaking of hospitals) a 45-year-old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near-death experience. Seeing God, she asked, "Is my time up?" God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth. She figured that since she had so much time to live she wanted to look her best.

After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was run down and killed by a speeding ambulance.

Arriving before God she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 43 years? So why didn't you pull me from the path of that ambulance?"

God says, "Sorry. I didn't recognize you."

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Raggedy post #3


Raggedy is feelin' a bit like this at the moment.



Raggedy post #3

It seems that Raggedy is still not up to her usual bubbly self so I thought I would put up another post to try and cheer her up a little, I find I’m playing in the big league here, not just the legendary Hoss, but now the reincarnation of another legend FTS.

I'll hafta watch my Ps and Qs, oh well I'll try. Peter


92 years old.

An elderly man walks into a confessional.

The following conversation ensues:

Man: "I am 92 years old, have a wonderful wife of 70 years,
many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Yesterday, I
picked up two college girls, hitchhiking. We went to a motel, where I
had sex with each of them three times."

Priest: "Are you sorry for your sins?"

Man: "What sins?"

Priest: "What kind of a Catholic are you?"

Man: "I'm Jewish."

Priest: "Why are you telling me all this?"

Man: "I'm 92 years old . I'm telling everybody!!"


Maxims for the Internet Age.

The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail.

A journey of 1000 sites begins with a single click.

You can't teach a new mouse old clicks.

Great groups from little icons grow.

Speak softly and carry a cellular phone.

Too many clicks spoil the browse.

A chat has nine lives.

Don't byte off more than you can view.

Fax is stranger than fiction.

What boots up must come down.

Windows will never cease.

In Gates we trust (and our tender is legal.)

Virtual reality is it's own reward.

Modulation in all things.

There's no place like http:/www.home.com

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day;
teach him to use the Net and he won't bother you
for weeks.

ALASKAN RETIREMENT

Tom had been in the liquor business for 25 years.
Finally, sick of the stress he quits his job and
buys 50 acres of land in Alaska as far away from
humanity as possible.
He sees the postman once a week
and gets groceries once a month,
otherwise there is total peace and quiet.

After 6 months of almost total isolation one day there
is a knock at his door. He opens it to see a huge
bearded man standing there, "Names Lars, I'm your
neighbor from 40 miles up the road.
Having a Christmas party Friday night about
5.00 o'clock.
Thought you might like to come.

"Great" says Tom,
"after 6 months out here I'm ready to meet
some local folk... Thank You."

As Lars is about to leave he says,"Gotta warn you...
Theres gonna be some drinkin'."

"Not a problem" says Tom,"after 25 years in the
business I can drink with the best of 'em."

Again the big man starts to leave and stops,
"More n' likely gonna be some fightin' too."

"Well I get along with people. I'll be alright.
I'll be there... Thanks again."

"More n' likely be some wild sex too" says Lars.

"Now that's really not a problem" says Tom,
warming to the idea,"I've been alone for 6 months!
I'll definitely be there...
By the way what should I wear?"

"Don't much matter" says Lars,
"Theres just gonna be the two of us!"

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Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Life Begins at 6,000 Feet


Greetings from the foothills of the Colorado Rocky Mountains. I received a note from Rags here asking if I would take a hiatus from my hiatus, so I put my life as Grizzly Adams aside for one day to poke my head back into civilization.

Indeed, rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated... although I did slip on a hiking trail once, teetering on the edge of a mountain about eight hundred feet above a crag that would have surely turned me into mountain roadkill. Nothing like living on the brink of breathing in crisp mountain air and becoming dinner for a bear.

As a Texan experiencing my first real winter, I have been in heaven. Not only did I see more snow than I've ever seen in all my years of broiling alive back in Dallas, but I rode out two blizzards a mere week apart, each dropping about three feet of pure white bliss. Looking out my window and seeing snow up to the windows of my car was almost euphoric.

I threw that word "almost" in there so you northerners wouldn't think I've lost all my marbles.

And get this -- the high country was still getting snow last weekend. Snow in June! Who could imagine such a thing. My star is still leading me to follow it to higher ground, some little town at about 9,000 feet, nestled snugly between a few fourteeners and with a Christmas card scene out my window six months out of the year.

Sigh...

Okay, enough about all that. I've managed to supply Rags with some of my drivel and buy her another day of laying around in bed. You all realize this is a ploy, right? She's getting us to fill in for her while she lounges around eating chocolate and watching soap operas.

Hmmm. And we fell for it.

Seriously, I hope she's better very soon. This is her place, and we're all just keeping it tidy for her until she gets back.

Well, most of us. Hoss did leave that beer can and his food wrappers on the desk.

Until we meet again...

FTS

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Monday, June 11, 2007

Raggedy says, "Back to bed b4 i git cought down hyer at the copuputer."

Here I am again, Old Horsetail Snake, with news of the lovely Rags. This picture is how poor Raggedy feels: Please don't leave me!!

Well, maybe not. But she did manage to eke out an email to me, part of which I will share with you. She has, she says, "spinal headaches," and she can't sit up for more than 10 minutes without excruciating pain. Then there's some more stuff about throwing up and dehydration and low spinal fluid. None of this is written in English, for she can hardly type.

For example, she sends me this: "Also I am srugling wiff that nevrve to findgrers thing, manking my tying an aroustisity and i don't have time to fixin it so I hope you get a chukcle form thry typo. Karen larufss her head arf with me."

(As a former newspaper editor, I have seen lots of misspelled words that I can make spell something. So it is with our buddy, Raggedy.)

So send her something to make her laugh, folks. She is worth your time.

(She also wrote: "Tell peter if you see him thanks from me." I had to put this in because her typing was almost perfect, as is Peter.)

+ + + + + + + +

Homer walked into a sports bar. He sat down next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10 o'clock news was on, and the news crew was covering the story of a man on a ledge of a large building, preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Homer and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"

Homer says, "You know, I bet he'll jump." To which the blonde replied, "I don't think he'll jump."

Homer put $20 on the bar and said, "You're on!" And just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset, but she handed her $20 to Homer, saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money."

Homer replied, "I can't take your money. I saw this earlier in CSpan, and I knew he would jump." The blonde replied, "I did too, but I didn't think he would do it again."

(Homer took the money.)

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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.5 License. It's a Raggedy Life