Monday, June 11, 2007

Raggedy says, "Back to bed b4 i git cought down hyer at the copuputer."

Here I am again, Old Horsetail Snake, with news of the lovely Rags. This picture is how poor Raggedy feels: Please don't leave me!!

Well, maybe not. But she did manage to eke out an email to me, part of which I will share with you. She has, she says, "spinal headaches," and she can't sit up for more than 10 minutes without excruciating pain. Then there's some more stuff about throwing up and dehydration and low spinal fluid. None of this is written in English, for she can hardly type.

For example, she sends me this: "Also I am srugling wiff that nevrve to findgrers thing, manking my tying an aroustisity and i don't have time to fixin it so I hope you get a chukcle form thry typo. Karen larufss her head arf with me."

(As a former newspaper editor, I have seen lots of misspelled words that I can make spell something. So it is with our buddy, Raggedy.)

So send her something to make her laugh, folks. She is worth your time.

(She also wrote: "Tell peter if you see him thanks from me." I had to put this in because her typing was almost perfect, as is Peter.)

+ + + + + + + +

Homer walked into a sports bar. He sat down next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10 o'clock news was on, and the news crew was covering the story of a man on a ledge of a large building, preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Homer and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"

Homer says, "You know, I bet he'll jump." To which the blonde replied, "I don't think he'll jump."

Homer put $20 on the bar and said, "You're on!" And just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset, but she handed her $20 to Homer, saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money."

Homer replied, "I can't take your money. I saw this earlier in CSpan, and I knew he would jump." The blonde replied, "I did too, but I didn't think he would do it again."

(Homer took the money.)


Blogger Skunkfeathers said...

I dunno if the Nigerian responses make her laugh, but they're so long, that sittin' thang might be a tad much.

Nonetheless, they be there at Skunkfeathers, widda nuddah one -- the last in the current series -- comin' up tamale (that's German for Mundane).

June 10, 2007 7:35 PM  
Blogger Jim said...

Hi Raggedy -- I know you are taking Hoss' Raggedy advice and laying low, or back for sure.

I found these riddles for you:

Q. What do you call a duck with all A's on his report card?

Q. What did the ocean say to the beach?

Q. Why did the farmer take a bucket of milk to church?

Q. Why did the farmer take a bucket of milk to the meadow?

I hope you like them. The answers are in the next comment.

Please don't peak until you try to answer them.

But don't try to think too hard because it could cause brain pain. I have a friend who is like that, after his ordeal it actually can be that way.

(=':'=) hugs
(")_ (")Š TO
the Cool Raggedy one
[I copied that again, glad you're back!]

June 10, 2007 9:39 PM  
Blogger Jim said...

Hi Raggedy -- Here are the answers. Mrs. Jim says they are too hard. I'll reserve judgement til my 10-year-old granddaughter has a try.

Q. What do you call a duck with all A's on his report card?
A. A wise quacker.

Q. What did the ocean say to the beach?
A. I'm not shore.

Q. Why did the farmer take a bucket of milk to church?
A. To get it pastor-ized.

Q. Why did the farmer take a bucket of milk to the meadow?
A. To get it pasture-ized.


(=':'=) hugs
(")_ (")Š TO
the Cool Raggedy one
[I copied that again, glad you're back!]

June 10, 2007 9:43 PM  
Blogger Justine said...

oh Jim, I thought the ocean said nothing, it only waved!

Here's a story about replacing windows :)

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that
expensive double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the contractor who called them. He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.
Hellloooo,...........just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I
am automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking
sales guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves!
Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him.
There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally
just hung up. He never called back. Guess I won that stupid argument.
I bet he felt like an idiot.

June 11, 2007 5:03 AM  
Blogger Peter said...

Hi to Raggedy and Hoss.... what a team..
it was nice of you to say i was perfect, can't say I think much of your judgment but thanks anyway.
If there isn't anything up in a day or so I'll look for some funnies to post for you COOL one.

June 11, 2007 5:05 AM  
Blogger Pat said...

Don't you just love blondes?
I'm so sorry Raggedy that you are feeling rotten and send buckets of good wishes to get you well again. Take it easy.xoxoxoxox

June 11, 2007 5:24 PM  
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Ifn you get to read this, Raggedy, I hope it brings a smile to your chinny chin chin. I wubs you.

June 11, 2007 5:32 PM  
Blogger Ladybug Crossing said...

Feel better soon!

June 12, 2007 6:43 AM  
Blogger Jeanette said...

Hi Raggedy , my best wishes go out to you for a very speedy recoveryHope your up and about soon

June 13, 2007 7:11 AM  

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