Thursday, January 25, 2007

Thursday Thirteen (15th)

Church Bulletin Announcements

#1 ~ Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help.

#2 ~ Thursday night-Potluck Supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

#3 ~ For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

#4 ~ This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

#5 ~ This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs... Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

#6 ~ The service will close with "Little Drops of Water". One of the ladies will start (quietly) and the rest of the congregation will join in.

# 7 ~ The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

#8 ~ At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

#9 ~ Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

#10 ~ Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.

#11 ~ The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

#12 ~ Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

#13 ~ The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge-Now Up Yours"

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged!


Blogger Cheryl L. Stansberry said...

I love reading these. It never gets old and they always brighten my day!

January 24, 2007 9:38 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

BWAHAHAHAHA!! Those are great!

January 24, 2007 10:22 PM  
Blogger Lisa @ The Plain-Spoken Pen said...

What a great list! I love reading these. Thanks for sharing and bringing a smile to my face.

Happy TT!

January 24, 2007 10:41 PM  
Blogger JHS said...

I've seen those before . . . I think somebody sent them to me in an e-mail, but I just cracked up reading them again. Thanks for brightening my evening! :-)

January 25, 2007 12:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Interesting list! I think I've seen them before too - but they are still hilarious!

Hope you are having a great day and thanks for coming by my blog :)

January 25, 2007 1:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He, he that's really funny and I just wanted to leave your blog because I saw your title and thought, sigh, another religious one, when I read a line !

January 25, 2007 1:07 AM  
Blogger Julie in Texas said...

Too funny! I love #3. Our pastor shared a similar list one Sunday in the bulletin. You just have to wonder who proofs these things!

Thanks for stopping by!

January 25, 2007 1:24 AM  
Blogger K said...

Those are hilarious!! I loved numbers 4, 5 and 6... these really made me laugh.

A great list!!

January 25, 2007 2:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very creative post. I love seeing these and wondering if any ever proofs things before they publish.

Happy TT

January 25, 2007 4:35 AM  
Blogger Sonny said...

That was funny! I love #9! It's a nice combination of "large double door" and "Weight Watchers"... ;)

My list is up, too!

Hugs and happy TT,
Sweet like Kitty
I will exercise for comments!!!

January 25, 2007 5:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I loved 8 and 9 especially. Great post!

January 25, 2007 5:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Number 1 really makes me laugh!

Happy TT

January 25, 2007 5:17 AM  
Blogger ChupieandJ'smama (Janeen) said...

Very funny Raggedy! I just came here from Skittles Place and you guys have a jokesters theme going this week. I like the Weight Watchers one. Did you change your blog or am I just seeing things?

January 25, 2007 6:02 AM  
Blogger Darla said...

Oh, what a difference a little typo can make! LOL

January 25, 2007 6:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fantastic! :-D

January 25, 2007 7:21 AM  
Blogger Girlie said...

Oh yeah, I like this list!

January 25, 2007 7:48 AM  
Blogger Carina said...

Oh yeah, I've always loved those. Probably because I'm a preacher's kid.

January 25, 2007 8:08 AM  
Blogger Skunkfeathers said...

LOL...seen those. Still funny.

January 25, 2007 8:27 AM  
Blogger Jane said...

Very funny list! I love your little cat icon! I see it everywhere, glad to see it's home!

January 25, 2007 8:30 AM  
Blogger FRIDAY'S CHILD said...

#9 is good. Wish I was near there. Can help the scouts with aluminum cans. Have lots of them.
My T13 is up too.

January 25, 2007 8:31 AM  
Blogger Ralph said...

Those got may day off to a good start. Thanks for the laugh.

January 25, 2007 8:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This priceless - number 13 was my favorite.
Thanks for visiting.
Waving at you from New York

January 25, 2007 9:35 AM  
Blogger L^2 said...

LOL! Great list - loved #8.
Happy TT! :-)

January 25, 2007 9:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hilarious! I have seen most of them before, but they are still funny.

January 25, 2007 9:59 AM  
Blogger mister jeter harris, hizself said...

i am a cat ...
an even i am laffin an laffin

January 25, 2007 10:35 AM  
Blogger Annie said...

Great list, thanks for the comment.
Yes, I am very tall! & no, I don't like any fruit at all! Crazy huh?

January 25, 2007 10:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yup that was a ROFLMAO list! Thanks for sharing.

January 25, 2007 11:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ROFL these are hilarious!!! #3 is my favorite I think :)

Thanks so much for visiting me!

January 25, 2007 11:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

great list!

January 25, 2007 11:40 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

LOL These are awesome! Thanks for posting them, I needed the laugh.

January 25, 2007 11:45 AM  
Blogger Jen said...

Those were hilarious! Thanks for the giggle :-)

January 25, 2007 12:07 PM  
Blogger Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Those never DO get old, do they? They rule, especially on a day when I needed the lift.

Happy TT and thanks for stopping by West of Mars; hope you'll do it more often!

January 25, 2007 12:40 PM  
Blogger Joely Sue Burkhart said...

Priceless!!! Happy TT! Joely

January 25, 2007 12:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A very busy church....and that's quite a signature you have!

January 25, 2007 1:14 PM  
Blogger Susie said...

That sounds like a furry wacky church! And da minister dude said "up yours" ... goodness!

January 25, 2007 1:17 PM  
Blogger Daphne said...

Thanks for the laughs -- I needed them today!

And thanks for your visit and comment at
Purrchance To Dream

Meow for now,

January 25, 2007 1:36 PM  
Blogger Angela/SciFiChick said...

I remember this list.. very funny.

January 25, 2007 1:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, I'm glad you enjoyed my T13.

Yours is grate! :~)

Some of these I've heard before but I never get tired of them!

have fun,

January 25, 2007 1:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

I've read these somewhere but this was my fave.

January 25, 2007 2:05 PM  
Blogger Marcia (MeeAugraphie) said...

This is a great list! One of the better ones on this subject.

January 25, 2007 2:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kool list and one to remember for sure! Thanks for coming by my 13!

January 25, 2007 2:19 PM  
Blogger Tink said...

Haha, great list! Thanks for sharing!
My TT lists 13 of my favourite goddess & fantasy artists.

January 25, 2007 2:56 PM  
Blogger Barbara said...

These get funnier each time I read them.

Check out my Thursday Thirteen

January 25, 2007 3:00 PM  
Blogger Lisa Kae said...

Loved the bulletin messages, very funny. You don't get hungry on the Fat Flush Plan. We avoid Wal-Mart because I get anxious when I go inside--something about the 30' tall ceilings with merch stacked most of the way up. Thanks for your comment, have a great week.

January 25, 2007 3:47 PM  
Blogger LZ said...

Oh my...what silly mistakes and great puns! Yes, I realize I'm a cat, but even I can recognize some good human humor!


January 25, 2007 4:03 PM  
Blogger Dane Bramage said...

These bulletins always crack me up. Thanks for visiting my Thursday thirteen #27, the 13 Home Repair and Improvement Projects I Have to Do edition.

January 25, 2007 4:03 PM  
Blogger Blog said...

If the secretary doesn't want that massage, I'll take it! ;)

January 25, 2007 4:12 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

A little typo goes a long way. These are very funny. Thanks for stopping by my blog and Happy TT.

January 25, 2007 4:13 PM  
Blogger Sara said...


January 25, 2007 4:14 PM  
Blogger Barb said...

Thanks for the laughs!!!!!

January 25, 2007 4:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ah the beauty of a few misspelled words, LOL!

January 25, 2007 4:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow...I read the BB's at super markets and laugh....these are funnier though!

January 25, 2007 4:56 PM  
Blogger Robyn said...

That was fabulous! I'm going to join my choir right now!!;)

January 25, 2007 5:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, I loved this! Great list! :) Thanks for sharing & Happy T13!

January 25, 2007 5:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This was soooo funny. Great list.

Thanks for visiting my brainstorm list on the American Revolution. I plan to post a follow up.

January 25, 2007 6:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I really enjoyed these! Thanks for stopping by!

January 25, 2007 6:43 PM  
Blogger Rachel said...

Loved it!! Too funny!!!

January 25, 2007 6:56 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Church is getting more interesting!

January 25, 2007 6:57 PM  
Blogger Irish Church Lady :) said...

Those are fun! I've seen them before but they still made me laugh.

Thanks for your visit to my TT earlier. Your kind thoughts and words are much appreciated.

I read the post about your friend Orv. He sounds like a great guy. Thanks for pointing me to it.


January 25, 2007 7:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness, those are absolutely hilarous. Thanks so much for the laughs!

I appreciate you stopping by my blog, and I wish you a wonderful weekend! :)

January 25, 2007 7:27 PM  
Blogger Rainbow said...

Hey Girl! Loved these they are hilarious! Great list!
Thanks for stopping by, I look for you every week!!!!!

January 25, 2007 7:33 PM  
Blogger Justice Fergie said...

This was too funny. I loved #3!

Thanks for visiting!

January 25, 2007 8:06 PM  
Blogger Cindy Swanson said...

I've seen these before, but they still gave me a great chuckle! My dad was a pastor of small churches, so he often typed the bulletin himself. One time he wrote that kids going to camp should pack "sour pair of underwear." Of course, he meant "four pair." :)

January 25, 2007 8:11 PM  
Blogger Sunflower said...

what a inspired list.
I am late again:-)

Thanks for stopping by my Sunflower blog and supporting me! Welcome back anytime.

I will Exercise for Comments!

January 25, 2007 8:26 PM  
Blogger TJ said...

I loved yours the best of all I've read this evening!!

January 25, 2007 8:47 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

A lovely list - your blog is very inspiring. Happy T13.

January 25, 2007 8:48 PM  
Blogger Kim said...

Holy Cow! I have laughed until there are tears running down my face. My dad is a preacher, and when I still lived at home, I helped type the church bulletin. I'm so glad we always double checked the spelling.

January 25, 2007 9:09 PM  
Blogger Mags said...

Those are hysterical. I love the one about coming early to listen to the choir!

Thanks for stopping by my blog earlier!

January 25, 2007 10:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Really like this. Very funny. :)

January 25, 2007 10:07 PM  
Blogger Jennfactor 10 said...

Loved this!
I tried to comment this morning and couldn't get comments to load! Sorry to be tardy!

January 25, 2007 10:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great 13 !
We have a church not far from us that we ALWAYS make sure to check their sign because they have such hilarious (sometimes intentional sometimes not) messages on their sign!
Thanks for visiting my 13 today!
have a great weekend

January 25, 2007 10:30 PM  
Blogger Cafe Cats said...

Those are fantastic!!!

Swing on by the cafe for my TT, there are toys!

January 25, 2007 10:42 PM  
Blogger alisonwonderland said...

i truly LOL'd at this list!

happy TT! thanks for stopping by!

January 25, 2007 11:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, did your Thursday 13 put a smile on my face. Thank you for a very entertaining read! :-)

January 26, 2007 12:05 AM  
Blogger Jeannine said...

Thanks you for stopping by my list. :-)

January 26, 2007 12:38 AM  
Blogger Fence said...

lol, those are great.
I especially like #8

January 26, 2007 3:05 AM  
Blogger Nathalie said...

I love this list, it really made me laugh! Thanks!

And thanks for dropping by at my blog!!

January 26, 2007 3:30 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Absolutely great list! Thanks for visiting my blog. My dh got me a Nano too. I'm sure your son is digging his. Mine has made me want to buy music all the time.

January 26, 2007 6:09 AM  
Blogger Carmen said...

our church bulletin used to post things like this every week - and even made a goof of their own once. :)

January 26, 2007 6:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

lol @ #1!

thanks for stopping by!

January 26, 2007 6:52 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

These are too funny!

January 26, 2007 8:00 AM  
Blogger M said...

Too, too funny! Thanks for stopping by my blog

January 26, 2007 8:05 AM  
Blogger Celfyddydau said...

I love these and the ones which are things children say.

January 26, 2007 8:12 AM  
Blogger -atomik kitten said...

Number 8 is right on. Our church tells everyone to join the choir...because the Bible says make a joyful NOISE. I sometimes joke that Joyful Noise should be the name - there are quite a few that are tone deaf. LOL

January 26, 2007 9:08 AM  
Blogger BlueBugg said...

lol :) thankyou for the giggles ;)

January 26, 2007 9:12 AM  
Blogger Kate said...

Ok, HYSTERICAL!!!! :) Thanks for the laugh! Have a blessed day today!

January 26, 2007 9:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*dying laughing*

Those were all great! Gotta love typos ;-)

January 26, 2007 10:46 AM  
Blogger Crazy Working Mom said...

*LOL* Great list! : )

January 26, 2007 11:22 AM  
Blogger Claire said...

The church near mine, always has ones like these up! no wonder they are closing.

January 26, 2007 6:00 PM  
Blogger Jill said...

Weight Watcher at your Church??? Weird!!

January 26, 2007 6:25 PM  
Blogger Christie said...

I love reading church bloopers - they never fail to make me laugh. Maybe it's something to do with being a PK...:) I'm glad you stopped by my TT - it's always good to meet a fellow Heel!

January 26, 2007 7:06 PM  
Blogger Amber said...

Oh, man, people REALLY oughta proofread! :)

January 26, 2007 7:08 PM  
Blogger An Ordinary Mom said...

I don't know if you really need another comment, but I just had to tell you thanks for making me laugh :) !!

Happy TT ... a day late!

January 26, 2007 7:14 PM  

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